Think about that." Then sheleft and I went down and cried. I knew it was coming but it was stillpainful to hear those words.I lost time again as the months and days past. I wondered why my headwasn't going on the block. Then, the Queen and her guards came back intomy cell and I knew it was coming. I asked her, "What is taking so long?Have you lost the executioners ax?"She sneered at me. Then she said the last thing I would have expected."I am considering sparing your life. Do you want to live?" Not really. I want to be with my mother in paradise." I told her. Thatwas my desire, to go be in the comfort of my mothers arms.She said, "That can be arranged. Would you rather live? I can spare yourlife, James. You can live freely in comfort if you want it."I thought it over and said, "Yes. You have conditions don't you? I betthat you will only spare me if I convert to catholism."She said no, "Of course not. I wouldn't spare you even if you converted.Your forgiveness that I mentioned months. I didn't think he liked me very much." I question that. He seems much more willing lately to take yourside. And that speech actually seems to be made out of genuineaffection for you." I think he appreciates what I've done for Lisa." Much more so than she does." That's not true." Really?" Come on. He's not my friend, she is." He was willing to tell you the surprise, but was stopped. He'stried to back you up, but either you or Lisa have stopped him." I just don't know anything anymore," I mumbled."That's OK, Brian. It's OK to be confused. I am, despite whatyou seem to think, trying to help you." How? By sabotaging my happiness?" I am not trying to quote 'sabotage your happiness,' I'm tryingto help you. So, tell me when love happened." Well, after Jim said his piece, Kenny softened up. Heapologized. He really paid attention to me all night. Asked meabout my job, we talked about baseball..." Did he apologize?" Not in so many words." So, no?" He was really nice to me..." Brian, Brian..
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